While my goal was to write a post weekly, that just DIDN'T and won't ever happen. I would love to write daily, I feel like I run through things to write as I'm driving, nursing or cooking but to sit down and actually type something is a different story.
The last few months especially have been a roller coaster in our house, we've been faced with unemployment, teething, insane weather conditions, the power outage leading up to Christmas, back to work (for me), tons of sickness and dealing with one small ass apartment!
Good news is that we are MOVING, yes finally!! And after all this chaos it really makes you appreciate the small stuff. I counting down the days until I have a bedroom door and Molly has a bedroom door... separate kitchen... oh the possibilities!! I get to have a life and normal relationship again!
Our living space since we have been together has been something only a few people I know can understand. Its difficult but amazing at the same time. The location, our landlords, you cannot beat. The size however has created some challenges and difficulties to say the least. It has limited us in what we can do and when - even when it comes to something as simple as talking... don't get me wrong we make noise when Molly is sleeping but we are hesitant to be loud when she is asleep because we want her to STAY asleep.
We don't get to sit on the couch and watch movies when she is in bed because, well, our couch is covered with toys (pretty much) and the volume is at a level that we can't comfortably hear it from there... its something we have grown accustomed to but really these things that most couples take for granted, as they should, just don't happen for us.
Being out here has also been isolating as we cannot have company whenever we want or multiple people/couples for that matter because unless people don't mind standing on sitting on the floor there is NO room to host. Unfortunately this has become an easy thing for me to accept and has driven a wedge between friends and family. The isolation of having a new baby, in itself, is a difficult thing for some and it was definitely a challenge for me; adding the isolation of our location and size of home its been a double whammy.
I'm not trying to be a whiner here but really just reaching out, both trying to help people around me understand what I have been through, why I have been how I have been and to let others know they are not alone if they are feeling the same way or in a similar situation.
I truly believe that this move is going to bring bigger and better things for us as a family, and help me heal from this emotional roller coaster I have been on.
Much love & healing,